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Movie Review: Vampires Suck

So, after making the woefully regrettable decision to pay money to see Date Movie a few years ago, I had vowed to stay far away from any other film under the same genre.

But, because I'm such an idiot, I allowed myself to be talked into watching a DVD version of the movie - maybe because I found the trailer pretty hilarious also. Sadly, that's basically it! Haha.

To be fair, I was actually surprised that Vampires Suck was an improvement over the previous spoof films. However, it's like saying it's the better crap out of all crap. Haha. I mean, the jokes were boring, obvious, predictable and just plain lazy. But I would be lying to myself if I said I didn't find some good that came out of this film because there are some improvements.

I thought that the lead actress, Jenn Proske, was a fantastic Kristen Stewart impersonator - literally every twitch, facial expression and bodily movement was dead on. Matt Lanter also did a good impersonation of Robert Pattinson's pain look. Haha.

Also, it was good that this film focused on only the first two Twilight films and did not rely on criticizing every film they possibly can as well as making lame pop culture reference after another just to get giggles - case in point, Meet The Spartans and Disaster Movie. Yes, there were still some pop culture references here and there but compared to the previous films where I got one every five seconds, I probably noticed one every five minutes. Haha.

Now, I can see what this film tries to be - exactly like or the next Scary Movie. But, let's face it, this movie wasn't a tenth of the creativity level as that of the spoof classic. In fact, that spoof - only part one, mind you - was released in 2000 and was the last good spoof to date! NO parody, including Vampires Suck, comes remotely close.

All that being said, the film was still bad because it was rarely funny. It worked when it was Scary Movie but it got worn out after a couple of sequels, Epic MovieDate MovieMeet the Spartans and Disaster Movie. The formula is dead. Although I will admit I laughed at some bits that took a jab at the TWILIGHT series. So, whatever.

Movie Review: Vampires Suck Reviewed by DAM on 1:14 AM Rating: 5

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